This is a very silly blog entry and has nothing to do with anti-racism or anti-oppression. I’m just saying. No irate emails please!
They say the first step in dealing with a problem is facing it and naming it.
And to be clear, I’m at best a low-femme, maybe a medium femme on a “fancy lady” day, even though I ain’t no fancy lady.
The issue: I’ve been looking for a courier style bag that will hold my cute purple laptop and the numerous personal crap that I need to drag around with me in the city, and when I travel around the province in May and June.
The problem: Here is a list of my current bags (in order of size), none of which meet my specifications. They do, however, meet other specifications. That’s part of the problem.
- Tiny black leather bag for when I go out dancing. It can hold some cash and my keys. My wallet is too big to fit in it, which I knew when I bought it. Please note the last time I went out dancing, that is, hanging out at home until 11 and then going out, was around the year 2000. This bag is in the “go” pile.
- Small black leather bag that can hold my wallet and not much else. It’s also for “going out” or “dancing”. Stop laughing. It’s staying.
- The largest of the small bags is a black MEC (Mountain Equipment Co-op) Sundog bag, big enough for my wallet and daybook (barely). It’s not pretty, it’s functional. It’s going.
4. In the medium-size range we have my fake leather bag (black) with a purple flower on it. The bag is made by a local designer and is made out of old tires. For a while it was the coolest thing I owned. It’s nice, it passes the “medium fancy femme” test. It’s staying.
5. Beautiful leather knapsack that my sister gave me (medium femme. Me, not my sister. My sister is a high femme), bought in Colombia. I haven’t used it in a number of years because it’s not big enough for files and it’s a bit awkward to wear. It’s going.
6. Lightweight black fabric bag that say F*ck F*ck F*ck on it, plus an “angry little girl” image. It’s a bit immature for me, given that I’m 42 and all, but I love it and I just got it as a gift from my sister. It has two cool little outside pockets, one for cel phone and one for ipod. It can’t be brought to any professional function. Staying!
7. My current Crumpler courier bag that is black/grey on the outside and bright orange on the inside that I bought to carry my laptop only to find that my laptop won’t fit in it. Damn. I’ve never liked the bright orange interior, it’s so not professional. It’s going.
8. Red cloth bag that I bought to carry my laptop and other things while travelling. It was cheap and it has no padded protection for the laptop. It’s going.
9. My decades-old hardly-used black leather briefcase. I’ve used it recently because my laptop and files do fit in it, but R has forbidden me from using it as it’s ugly (I don’t disagree, I just don’t care). It’s going.
10. My sturdy blue MEC knapsack. It fits my laptop, my waterbottle, and all my regular day- to-day crap. It’s not professional, but it suits my needs for non-professional moments, which is most of the time. Staying.
Ten bags is a lot for one person, and this isn’t including the two pieces of luggage I own, one black satchel kinda bag (small) and one red suitcase (medium). I’m a light packer, and I hardly ever travel. They’re both staying. They’re also tucked away in my closet and don’t bug me by falling out of the coat closet and all over everything like my other bags.
So, I have a problem, and I realize that I’m also always drawn to bags, always looking for that perfect size, colour (hard to believe since most of my bags are black) and how it looks on me. This needs to stop.
Here’s a picture of my Pile of Bags of Shame.